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Jaddels    5

Granted the puppy is named Lucky and he is being held by Awesomeface1122 when he is ran over by the truck. 

 

I wish I could teleport to places I want to go.

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Granted, but it's made of apples similar to the one the witch gave sleeping beauty and you suffer a similar fate as hawt.

I wish i had a cake; a chocolate cake.

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Granted, but the chocolate cake is living and has children, and it has very rude things to say about you.

I wish I could be a god.

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Granted, you are now one of the wooden "gods" from the Congo and you burn to ashes in a mysterious fire.

I wish i had a black bike this time.

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Granted, however your black bike is made out of Legos, and its blocky wheels cannot bear the weight of a human being.

I wish I had a potato.

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granted but then a single cat walks through the room and your dominion over their brains crumbles

I wish to be the dictator of a small country in the Pacific ocean where I can rule with an iron fist and retain almost no media attention in the international community 

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(Lmao, that was completely random.)

Granted, but you are quickly removed because someone else is more awesome.

I wish I could have infinite wishes.

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